Friday, March 27, 2009

Party Crashers

I read Chewing the Fat whenever Dave updates, which is nearly every day. His post, An Elephant Disappears, told of an incident at an airport that demonstrates an extreme of the ableist mindset. For those of us in the disability blog world, it is astounding, but ultimately believable, because we know Dave and know we can trust him, and we know ableism, both as a word and the concept behind it. We know it, and talk about it, the same as we know and talk about the social model or self-advocacy.

It is something, isn't it, how blogs become little homes, or maybe parlors, where we expect to meet with certain visitors who know us and have a history with us, and we say things in ways that our expected visitors understand and build friendships and kinships. And then, every once in a while, a parlor gets inundated with strangers. Some are come back again as friends, most are just curious but well-meaning one-time guests, and a dread few are home invaders. I see it happen so often to Beth, and now see these party crashers at Dave's. And I wonder about the people who go to other people's personal blogs and act rudely. Do they act like this in real life? If so, they must spend a lot of time "thinking it over" under the custody of their local constabulary.

As someone who is more often a guest making a comment than the other way round, I too find it disorienting when I go make my visits to my friends and find all this noise going on. But not to worry. Friends stay around after the excitement has died down, pick up trash and wash dishes.


One Sick Mother said...


I know exactly what you mean. I have been quite taken aback by some comments made by people who obviouly don't "know" the blogger very well. and didn't take the time to do so.

I have been tempted to respond to some of them directly, but I think ultimately that is a counterproductive tactic. Many of these people are seeking attention and to give them any attention -even negative attention- only reinforces the behaviors. (See all I have learned from being an Autism mom?)

Lisa Moon said...

I agree with OSM; I've been tempted to retort but believe these trolls with extra large... ahem, attitudes, will just use it to fan their fires - their misplaced, hateful, screwed-up fires.

I can't help but assume that people who have nothing better to do than read a blog and, say with Beth's case, write mean, hurtful and accusatory things to the writer. Why? Who cares if you don't like them or believe them or whatever?!

DON'T READ IT! Let me say it again for you, slowpoke... sheesh.

And it seems to happen to those who garner large readerships, like Dave and Beth. Jealousy must figure in, no?

yanub said...

I hadn't thought of jealousy as an element, but that's a possibility. Maybe, out of jealousy, when some people stumble on a popular blog, they try to poison their reputation by making unfounded accusations. It's a simple enough matter to read back a few posts to figure out what a blogger is all about.