tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-85572742024-03-12T18:45:41.458-05:00yet another never updated blogSometimes I have something to say, and here is where I say it. Lots of talk about disability, Ehlers Danlos syndrome, general geekiness, family and friends, and whatever shiny captures my attention at the moment.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.comBlogger195125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-25363473694617975232012-01-28T19:32:00.002-06:002012-01-28T19:37:12.448-06:00Is this thing actually working?Maybe I will reactivate it just to share this hilarious email from Livejournal:<br /><br /><blockquote>Dear yanub.blogspot.com!<br /><br />LiveJournal is planning to start deleting inactive empty accounts. Pursuant to our housekeeping policy, your LiveJournal account yanub.blogspot.com is scheduled to be deleted in 15 days.<br /><br /> If you wish to reactivate your account to avoid deleting, please visit http://www.livejournal.com and log in within 15 days of this notification.<br /> If you do not remember the password for your account, you can reset it following instructions over here.</blockquote><br /><br />So, does Google known the LJ is now in charge of blogspot?yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-40826862674114777382010-09-07T17:16:00.002-05:002010-09-07T17:37:25.522-05:00Farewell, bloggerI have migrated the contents of this blog to a new one hosted by WordPress. I am tired of being constantly locked out of Blogger at home, unable to either comment on friends' blogs or post to my own. Please visit me at <a href="http://iformaybe.wordpress.com/">iformaybe</a> and reset your links, if by some chance you actually link to me.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-9713824881321793352010-08-10T10:14:00.003-05:002010-08-10T10:30:18.230-05:00Me v. PlantsPlants win.<br /><br />This past summer, I moved back into Austin to be near work. I was just so tired of losing two hours a day to driving and of all the associated expense.<br /><br />I have lately been reminded, quite harshly, of why I was willing to commute an hour into and out of town for work rather than live near work. Austin is a sink for pollution and pollen. I have severe allergies. We are not a good combination.<br /><br />At any rate, this past summer has been mild and moist, a perfect growing environment for nearly any plant. And what plant is most annoying come August? Ragweed. And it is everywhere, and worse than usual, and I feel hellish. I've been on steroids since Friday and can't say that I feel particularly better. I can't get the crap out of my lungs, and the medicines I'm on, while keeping me out of the hospital, add their own layer of lethargy, stupidity, and clumsiness to that so helpfully already provided by asthma. I do OK as long as I am semi-reclining in bed. But bills get paid by me getting out of bed and hauling my ass to work, so into work I must go even though I get exhausted just surfing the net. <br /><br />And work? The air conditioner is broken. Lovely. Nothing to filter the air or remove a few ounces of water from it. Yesterday, I ended up begging to go home for a bit, just so I could rest enough to close up the office later. Since it was either that or me slowly crawling on hands and knees unable to summon the strength to get up, the boss agreed. Fact, people: Oxygen is vital to good health.<br /><br />Enough whining. I have to get myself ready to go in again. Maybe the AC will be working.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-40558724315778129752010-07-18T23:07:00.004-05:002010-07-18T23:58:04.997-05:00Shougai YakushaA while back, I was reading an English language blog on life in Japan. The post was about a government report that seven of ten Japanese people with disabilities have experienced discrimination. The first comment, from someone with disability: "And the other three were in a vegetative state and couldn't answer." All comments after that agreed that the first comment was correct, that discrimination is extremely wide-spread and the report was likely understating the problem.<br /><br />So, it was with great interest that I read that Kotaro Yanagi, a member of the ikemen* acting troupe, D-BOYS, had published an autobiography of his life since sustaining a severe brain injury. Great interest, and despair, because my ability to read Japanese is pretty much limited to distinguishing the men's and women's toilets. But now one of his bilingual fans is taking it on herself to translate for all the people who have bought the book but can't read it. Seeing as I was hopelessly pondering how expensive it would be to find someone to do that very thing, I couldn't be more delighted.<br /><br />She has just started and only has the prologue up, but if you are curious, you also might want to read <a href="http://community.livejournal.com/yakubun/682.html">Hicchan's Translations</a>. And, like she says, <a href="http://www.amazon.co.jp/gp/product/4847019032?ie=UTF8&tag=hicchan0a-22&linkCode=as2&camp=247&creative=7399&creativeASIN=4847019032">buy Yanagi's book</a> even if you can't read it.<br /><br />At any rate, I am very eager to read how Kotaro has managed to continue as a performer. And also, I am delighted that he's still considered an ikemen actor. I wonder if the same thing would hold for a young American actor who faced similar difficulties.<br /><br />*good-looking (only applied to men)yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-14865679519537508492010-07-04T16:47:00.004-05:002010-07-04T17:37:55.406-05:00Ashley treatment, writ largeI have been incredibly busy lately, and so quite late in checking blogs, email, festering sores that need attention.... OK, I did manage to work in the attention to festering sores. But I have had a deficit of web time. Yesterday, I was finally able to work through my RSS feed. Huzzah! And good thing I looked instead of just marking all as read, as I was tempted to do after three weeks of neglecting it. For there in <a href="http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula">Pharyngula</a>, was a post about some perversely diabolical doctors essentially recommending taking poison to <a href="http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/2010/06/attention_perversely_assertive.php">prevent the calamity of lesbian daughters</a>. He is shocked and horrified, calling it "a convenient anti-uppitiness pill for women" and supplied a link to <a href="http://www.thehastingscenter.org/Bioethicsforum/Post.aspx?id=4754&blogid=140">Alice Degner's criticism of the experiments at Bioethics Forum</a>. A commenter also gives a link to <a href="http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/fetishes-i-dont-get/201006/have-is-hold-0">Degner's commentary</a> on the matter at <span style="font-style:italic;">Psychology Today</span>.<br /><br />While both of Degner's articles are worth reading in full, I call your attention to this sentence from her <span style="font-style:italic;">Psychology Today</span> piece: <span style="font-style:italic;">A democratic medical establishment does not alter people's bodies to fit regressive social norms; it advocates for patients by demanding the social body get its act together.</span><br /><br />This, this, this. This is why the attacks on people with severe disability, the failure to respect basic bodily integrity and human rights, are not an attack on just people with disabilities. It's convenient and self-assuring to assume that what happened to Ashley X, the maiming of her body for her parents' convenience, is something that only happens to a special class of people for whom it somehow a "good." But it shouldn't be so hard for people to understand that there are a whole lot of groups of people who aren't convenient. As David said "Ashley is me. I am Ashley. And you are Ashley, too." (Sorry, I lost the link to David's blog post and now only have this <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2007/HEALTH/01/11/ashley.outcry/">CNN article</a>.) And now a medical "cure" to fix the main problem of being inconvenient! <br /><br />This is much in keeping with the historic "destroy the Indian in order to save him" tactic of late nineteenth century US humanitarians (and, I understand, the practice of forced deculturization also has been done by Australians against native peoples there). "Of course," they say with a patronizing tone, "nobody actually hates the _________ (disabled, blacks, Indians, women, gays, etc.). This is for their own good. Because we <span style="font-style:italic;">care</span>!" And, yes, I suppose it is a better approach than Phillip Sheridan's "nits make lice" genocidal one. But, my dears, it is the same damnable attitude. If the "other" is acceptable only when made convenient, the "other" isn't acceptable at all. And what of those who can not be made convenient under any circumstance? Then there is Sheridan's approach, which the patronizing will let happen while they wring their hands over how sad it all is.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-29925529778801004442010-04-22T09:38:00.004-05:002010-07-03T12:01:42.317-05:00Post deletedI just got tired of having to delete spammer comment requests. <br /><br />Back soon with posts that will hopefully not become time-sinks from dealing with dingleberries trying to sell s e ks. (Weird spelling in the hopes of killing spambot interest.)yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-58073555214792974682010-04-03T22:22:00.002-05:002010-04-05T22:28:20.414-05:00Look, Ma, an update!It was bound to happen. The past few weeks, I had been thinking how well I feel, how I was able to get all sorts of things accomplished and that my pain levels were completely manageable with hardly any narcotics at all. Oh, sure, there were other things. Asthma attack. Gluten contamination. Some minor narcolepsy-type events. But nothing all that serious. Thus, I planned a busy Easter weekend doing housework and getting paperwork taken care of.
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<br />Which means, of course, that first thing this morning, my right foot went out of place and all I can do is wait for it to reduce itself. As long as I stay completely off it, I'm fine. But as soon as I get up, I'm hurting. I can't do housework, can't cook, can't rummage through my files looking for the papers I need, because all that requires that I stand and walk and use my hands. And I can't stand and have free hands since I need them to hold onto the canes to keep the weight off my foot. Not even my fancy-schmancy shoes help.
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<br />Here's hoping tomorrow is better, because there is so much I need to do. I want to at least put my new plants in pots.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-39307843120104596082010-03-13T00:37:00.004-06:002010-03-13T00:49:44.078-06:00How dare they!My friend <a href="http://fridawrites.blogspot.com/2010/03/i-dont-deserve-this.html">Frida was verbally abused</a> by people paid out of tax money, in front of her children, because she uses a mobility device. <br /><br />There are people who insist that "nobody hates the disabled." Those are generally the words that one hears prior to explaining how discrimination against people with disabilities isn't actually discrimination. Don't tell me this isn't hate. Don't tell me it isn't frightening and intimidating, that it isn't meant to be frightening and intimidating. Don't tell me they hadn't intended to degrade her. I am sick of excuses.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-53675497318910095142010-02-23T22:07:00.003-06:002010-02-23T22:22:50.099-06:00The end of the world is nigh<iframe allowfullscreen='allowfullscreen' webkitallowfullscreen='webkitallowfullscreen' mozallowfullscreen='mozallowfullscreen' width='320' height='266' src='https://www.blogger.com/video.g?token=AD6v5dzWwslOD7fCcYD1yEtrpqfiQ6CHAiBzRUwG-6rJ6WlHdCNyq09xJZnAx4oTqQo5BRUJWa5qUm1FGW8' class='b-hbp-video b-uploaded' frameborder='0'></iframe><br /><br />Yes, boys and girls, the unthinkable has happened, and we had actual snow that caused the people in suits to send us home early from work. Just a smattering of snow, you say? Aha! Spoken like someone who lives where there are enough sand trucks to get to all the bridges before the carnage mounts.<br /><br />Frankly, I would have preferred to have been told not to come in at all, since driving in a mix of hail, sleet, and snow is not my idea of a fun time for all.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-74829620618478318932010-02-13T14:55:00.003-06:002010-02-13T15:02:16.412-06:00Cause of death: Easily distracted by shiny objectsOK, friends, I need a gadget. Surely there is something out there that will alert me that I have forgotten to turn off the burner on the stove. Something besides the smoke alarm that I can never reach and end up knocking to the ground where it lies dormant until I get someone else to put it back up. Something that will come on <span style="font-style:italic;">before</span> the smoke alarm. That would be good. I've already managed to cook the spout right off one tea kettle. Stop me before I manage new feats of inadvertent stove-top metallurgy.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-51817332196507437932010-01-23T18:49:00.001-06:002010-01-23T18:51:24.643-06:00A friendly warningIf you get cinnamon shower gel as a gift, do not use it on your face. Or more personal areas.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-24502211720627083622010-01-07T21:06:00.003-06:002010-01-07T21:44:21.615-06:00Good news in shoes?One of the last things I did in 2009 was go, yet again, on a quest for decent orthopedic shoes. This time, I even remembered to bring my prescription! Yay! When you know from the outset that your fugly shoes and insoles are going to cost you in the neighborhood of $200, it is nice to know at least they won't be taxed. <br /><br />The ones I bought back in August were already breaking down from the stress of my gait and stance and being worn constantly everyday. And shoes that are breaking down don't do much to prevent pain or keep me from falling over. And if the shoes aren't preventing pain and keeping me upright, then tell me again why I am wearing orthopedic shoes with my dresses? Yes, time for new visually unappealing footwear.<br /><br />I went to a different orthopedic shop this time, that carries slightly different stock in both shoes and in-soles. So, this time, I ended up with a pair of Drew Boas and a whole new in-sole build. The Boas are still not what one would call appropriate for dresses, but I actually like their look. They are black with silver highlights and glow-in-the-dark white piping. (Just like the one on <a href="http://www.drewshoe.com/featured-items.aspx">this page</a> about them.) And they don't have to be tied, which is an unexpected good feature. Instead, there's a knob on the back that twists to tighten the lacing. Since my fingers are on the wanky side, my laces were always coming undone and posing a tripping hazard. I still have to tighten these throughout the day, but the laces can only get a bit loose, not flop around. And I just have to tug on the knob to loosen the laces up enough to take the shoes off, so removing them isn't the chore it often is if I have ties that I've managed to somehow get to stay put.<br /><br />OK, that's the shoe part. The really exciting part is the insole. They had me try <a href="http://www.cluffy.com/cons_faq.html">Cluffy Wedges</a> to prevent my big toes from hyperextending and help with the pronation. And they work! I was really hesitant to say anything to y'all at first for fear that the good effects were temporary and that my sloppy feet would just find a new way to fail. And maybe they still will. Who knows? My feet have mysterious Fail powers. But these past two weeks, it's been amazing. Dear hearts, I actually have been able to take the stairs because my knees and hips have fallen into alignment. I had--get this!--muscle pain in my thighs and back instead of joint pain from the waist down! To me, this is sort of the toe version of Silver Ring Splints. Yes, I still have to have significant arch support and a lift for my left leg, and I still have to wear orthopedic--er, "comfort"--shoes, but it is a big deal to be able to actually stand in the checkout line at the grocery store for as long as it takes instead of having to abandon the cart and try shopping again some other time.<br /><br />And I'm also happy with <a href="http://www.totalrelieffootwear.com/">Total Relief Footwear</a>, for not only figuring out a good system for me but also being understanding in finding me something that I don't find depressing to wear. They were worth the extra driving distance.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-58246493302471570982009-12-29T16:26:00.003-06:002009-12-29T17:12:06.739-06:00In the Reception RoomI went to the doctor's today, just to get a new prescription for orthopedic shoes. It was cold and rainy, and I was glad to find parking and get inside without falling down. I signed in and took a seat.<br /><br />Across from me, a pleasant woman maybe a decade older than me spoke in soft Tejano accents with a man near my age. Their level of ease with each other indicated they were family. The man was called in for his visit and after he left, the woman looked at me and smiled like she had something she just had to say.<br /><br />"Are you here to see the doctor?"<br /><br />"Yes, just to get a prescription."<br /><br />"You are so lovely. You look very good."<br /><br />Well! Well! Now, that's a good start to anyone's day!<br /><br />A bit embarrassed, I thanked her and asked how her Christmas had been. "Oh, very nice." She was visiting her niece, she told me. I asked where she had come in from. Laredo. I said I hoped she'd flown, because it is too long a drive.<br /><br />"And how was your Christmas?" she asked, turning the subject back to me.<br /><br />"Good. I spent it with my daughter and son-in-law."<br /><br />A moment's pause.<br /><br />"Are you a widow?"<br /><br />I suppose I looked confused, so she repeated herself, and I realized I just hadn't accounted for her accent. A widow. <br /><br />"No, just divorced for many years. Are you widowed, then?"<br /><br />Yes, she told me, eight years now. Her eyes focused on an inner place of her heart.<br /><br />"It was a freak accident, the day before Thanksgiving. My husband was diabetic."<br /><br />"A car accident?" I was thinking of the diabetics I have known who have misjudged their sugar level and had serious, though fortunately, not fatal, accidents.<br /><br />"No. We were at home. I was busy in another part of the house. He was painting the bathroom. Somehow, he fell. He must have hit his head, and he cut himself badly. By the time I came to check on him, he had bled to death."<br /><br />She smiled. "I get through the days because I know he waits for me. I look forward to when we are together again."<br /><br />Her family member came out and sat down, apparently needing to wait for his shot to take effect and preferring the drafty reception room and the company of his aunt to the sterility of the examination room.<br /><br />"Until then, I must live everyday."<br /><br />"Because that's what he would want for you, to live fully?"<br /><br />"Yes." She looked at the man beside her, and smiled. I'd say she beamed with love, but that would give the impression that she wasn't beaming with love before. You could tell, from her despairing heart, she pours her love into those around her.<br /><br />You know what? She was so lovely.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-21861477346453060352009-12-26T18:45:00.003-06:002009-12-26T19:03:29.223-06:00Xmas: survived!It isn't that I hate Xmas. I don't have any negative feelings about it. I just don't love it, not the way that the incessant carols and advertising and build-up since before Halloween insist that I should. I enjoy New Year's Day much more, with its simple meal and quiet contemplation. And the week preceding, when I put away all the claptrap of Xmas and try to get out of the way any business holding over from this current year so that I can start freshly on the 1st.<br /><br />But I did have a lovely Xmas. I got an unanticipated phone call from my brother, who merely wanted to chat and ask when I would come to see him. And I spent the day with my daughter and son-in-law, in their underheated, drafty abode, warmed by the fire of my silly girl's love for Xmas. As much as I am indifferent to the day, she is downright bouncing off the wall with excitement for. But, then, she's like that with everything, and it is one of the many endearing traits she has. I came away with tons of gluten-free cookies, all home-baked, and what feels like a literal ton of Japanese language learning magazines. The cookies are becoming ever lighter, but the magazines are still in my car, awaiting the assistance of someone who can not only pick them up but do so without collapsing immediately. So, maybe tonight, then, if the son-in-law comes by.<br /><br />To everyone, whether your Xmas was good, bad, or indifferent, may the last week of 2009 be the perfect preface for the new year to come.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-21515527473750707802009-12-22T21:48:00.005-06:002009-12-26T19:41:24.532-06:00Japan and disabilities--linksSo, to help me on my way, I am collecting informative links about disabilities and society in Japan. These will be news stories and the like. Feel free to send me a link if you find something. I will edit this post as I find new things. <br /><br /><a href="http://mdn.mainichi.jp/mdnnews/news/20091222p2a00m0na004000c.html">A politician calls for eliminating the "weak"</a>. He also plays a ukulele while singing about people who oppose him. I suspect his song must go on quite a bit, because he must have a long line of people who dislike him. <br /><br /><a href="http://mdn.mainichi.jp/mdnnews/news/20091221p2a00m0na019000c.html">A disabled man is killed by shiftless lowlifes who pocketed his disability income</a>. There should be prize to the first country that figures out how to protect dependent citizens from such vultures.<br /><br /><a href="http://media-dis-n-dat.blogspot.com/2009/12/japanese-city-reinvents-itself-as-model.html">There's a city that has made an effort to become an accessible tourist attraction</a>. Interesting how that one politician sees people with disabilities as a burden, while a large number of pols in Takayama must see people with disabilities as an opportunity, instead.<br /><br /><a href="http://media-dis-n-dat.blogspot.com/2009/12/japanese-man-with-spina-bifida-will.html">A man who has practiced aikido and is biking around Guam</a>. Was that common, 40 years ago, to expect babies with spina bifida to die early? That is surprising to me.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-52577758757165050892009-11-28T01:39:00.005-06:002009-11-28T02:09:29.863-06:00ThankfulThe past few weeks have been exhausting. Between a hellish pace at work and my joints, I have been beat. Too beat to even think about having something witty, useful, or at all worth reading to write. And not hardly the energy to read anyone else's blogs or answer emails. <br /><br />For Thanksgiving, hoping to contain the general family mayhem, I had everyone over, knowing that the lack of TV reception would have them all eating and leaving in short order. Yes, I am devious that way. It was tiring getting up early when I so needed to sleep in, but rewarding to see my vegetables being eaten, eat my mom's turkey and ham, and celebrate a new step-nephew's inclusion into the family. And then, today I slept. And slept. And slept. I think the muscle pain may finally be wearing down.<br /><br />I saw the ortho Tuesday, told him I wasn't going to do the PT or see the neurologist again because I think his diagnosis was wrong. And he agreed, encouraged me to essentially keep being bullheaded, and said we will just take things as they come. I'm thinking I may be past the defensive medicine stage with him, so that is good. <br /><br />The wound on my back from the removal of the carcinoma seems to be healing OK. It has stopped oozing, and the skin around it, that had started to break out and blister from the bandages, has calmed down and is looking mostly normal. The scabs are sort of half on and half off, and still itchy, but at least I can lie down on my back now when I sleep. Another good thing.<br /><br />Most importantly, I have the desire to research again. Finding the time to do it will be the trick, but my efforts at learning Japanese and my interests in pop-culture and disability issues are all sort of coming together at the moment. My money, time and employment issues are the same dragging forces as ever, but my interest is back. And maybe even some of you will want to know what I come up with, despite my lack of useful affiliation with any institution and absence of peer reviewed publication? Or maybe I'm just at a stage where I no longer care about those things, and will just do what I want.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-39194501304133361622009-11-14T19:25:00.002-06:002009-11-14T19:28:42.949-06:00New comment policyI'm sorry to do this, but the increased number of spambot comment submissions make it necessary. From now on, you will need to log in with your Blogger or Open ID account in order to leave a comment. Real comments from real humans who have something decent to say (as opposed to trolls and spammers) will continue to be accepted.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-82092313651622193212009-11-07T21:04:00.003-06:002009-11-07T21:10:12.799-06:00Derm test resultsThe dermatologist's office called yesterday with the results, and, sure enough, I have a basal cell carcinoma. I'll get it removed Monday morning, then go to work. I hope there is something better to do that just put vaseline on the wound, because that is what he is having me do for the wound from the biopsy, and, man, I am getting sick of my shirt sticking to the oozy scab.<br /><br />I'm not worried about the surgery itself. It should be fast and hopefully completely remove the offending skin. I've had a basal cell carcinoma in the same spot before, but it was treated with topical chemicals rather than just getting rid of the damned thing.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-39401327190985673762009-11-04T01:53:00.003-06:002009-11-04T02:19:13.081-06:00Dermatologist comes complete with clue!Wow!<br /><br />I went this morning (well, now it's yesterday morning) to a dermatologist to have my back checked since Carapace had thought she spotted some problematic moles. <br /><br />Once the dermatologist began his check, he noticed my ring splints and asked me what they were for. I told him, "to keep my thumbs on." Then I told him that my daughter has an official diagnosis of EDS, hypermobile. (My own official diagnosis is much more vague and scattered.) He's touching and pulling on my skin, and says "I was going to ask you about that." Then, "what other symptoms do you have?" I told him all my joints are generally lax and that some people say I have soft skin. And he said, "It <span style="font-style:italic;">is</span> soft." Then asked me some more questions about Carapace and other family members.<br /><br />Now, you may wonder, why I am impressed with this. After all, I am pretty obviously symptomatic, right? And I always give a complete medical history, both personal and family. But doctors hear what they want to hear, see what they want to see, and will tell you to shut up if they don't like you rocking their world with conditions they don't feel adequate to treat. They'd rather send you for endless pointless testing in the hopes that it will lead to something they know about than believe the evidence in front of them. But this doctor was different, and for the first time in a long time, I feel like I can trust a doctor, and my confidence in my own ability to assess what is going on with me is better because of that.<br /><br />So. That ortho? He can either pull his head out and pay attention to what I say, or I can see a different one who listens in the first place.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-39109180525580018302009-10-31T10:06:00.003-05:002009-10-31T10:40:01.561-05:00and the ortho says....Frozen shoulder. He didn't think the tear was significant. <br /><br />I don't know. Maybe? He didn't seem convinced himself. He kept asking me if my shoulder was stiff, and I kept telling him I couldn't move it through it's full range. That's different from stiff, right? Stiff is where you move slowly, but after a while, it isn't so bad. I wish doctors would use the same language the rest of us use. It would make things so much easier.<br /><br />And he doesn't seem to understand the connection between shoulder problems and hand problems. Or he doesn't talk as if he understands. <br /><br />Anyways, he prescribed PT. I'm willing to try just about anything, but I am dubious since he decided against any specific instructions to the therapist, on account of him being not so sure himself. Well, maybe I'll be pleasantly surprised with an unusually good therapist.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-33289692300746100452009-10-29T13:34:00.002-05:002009-10-29T13:37:15.686-05:00very slight updateSo, apparently I have a torn tendon. I don't have an appointment yet with the ortho, but it will be soon. I hope something good can be done, because my hand keeps going out of place now, too. Not that it takes much to make that happen, but still, not having it lock up on top of everything else would be nice.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-8897805410935996372009-10-24T14:21:00.003-05:002009-10-24T15:20:54.857-05:00Eventful events are eventfulAs promised, a long-delayed blog post!<br /><br />These past couple of weeks seem to have been conspiring against me getting online again. But I found a place that actually fixes power jacks for cheap and without a bunch of caveats, so here I am again! Yay! The little beast is working better than it has in years, so I am hopeful of maybe now having it for some years to come yet.<br /><br />It's been frustrating not having the laptop since work has been so busy I haven't been able to do much more than sometimes clean out my in-box of emails that didn't absolutely need to be answered and mark everything in my RSS feed as "read". If you said something that you were really hoping I in particular would read, and I haven't responded, give me a holler. Sorry for the inconvenience.<br /><br />At least, the laptop woes coincided with the weekend Carapace and I had planned to go to TRF. I have some pictures, and I will post a few later if all goes as planned. We camped, as usual. As is not usual, the weather was as close to perfect as it can get for a Texas autumn and Carapace managed to have not one single significant seizure! I, sadly, had my usual allergies keeping the entire campground awake (ha! That'll teach those guys who put their tent right up against ours!) and, despite my efforts to plan, perimenopause played the hormone roulette wheel and came up red. Still, that did not negate the very important experience I had using a pair of hiking sticks instead of just my cane, or even pair of canes. With the hiking sticks, I escaped having notable leg and hip pain for the first time in years--and that despite my period! It had gotten to be so bad previously that I wasn't even looking forward to going. So, I highly recommend getting yourself some if you are a cane-user and have started to miss out on events that require a lot of walking.<br /><br />My niece is out of the woods as far as the overdose is concerned. She's facing a long stint in psyc rehab, though. She prefers that to going home, I know, since the home environment is currently unstable due primarily to financial strains. There are other issues, too, but I don't like talking out of school about other people's personal lives. The one thing I will say is that, my family is in denial about how pervasive mental illness is in our family. It isn't just one individual with a problem. Most of us are untreated, uncounseled, and our coping skills are <span style="font-style:italic;">ad hoc</span>, to put it nicely. I really admire Glenn Close and her sister, Jessie, for their <a href="http://media-dis-n-dat.blogspot.com/2009/10/actress-glenn-close-speaks-out-about.html">decision to speak out</a> about mental illness in their family. I hope that it will encourage other families, including my my own, to take positive action and be more supportive of each other emotionally. (And, in case my family stumbles onto this and puts two and two together, I love you all. Just, wouldn't it be nice to stop pretending and start dealing with reality instead?)<br /><br />In more horrifying news, a coworker of mine has an aunt who is likely to not emerge from the coma that her husband put her into. It is a classic case of an abuser first isolating his victim, and then escalating the abuse. I am astounded that the husband is out on bond. How can this be? Why isn't domestic abuse taken more seriously?<br /><br />Oh, and finally, much less universally depressing but potentially more annoying for me personally, it looks like I have a torn rotator cuff. And that I am actually going to have to do something about it, what with not being able to use my left arm being a real nuisance, what with me being left-handed and the driver's side door being on the left in the US. I don't know if it will mean surgery and then PT, or just PT, but, either way, I have a feeling I am facing a lot of PT. And I hate PT. So, expect a lot of griping.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-72683084093999733252009-10-22T12:35:00.002-05:002009-10-22T12:38:40.580-05:00My precioussssssss is returned!Oh, laptop, darling, darling laptop! Don't ever leave me again!<br /><br />The past week or so has been eventful, and the next few weeks also promise (threaten?) more of the same. So, I should blog about that. But not right now. Right now, I should get back to work. But this weekend, I'll be sure to catch you all up on my exciting life.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-79774694012196523802009-10-12T22:37:00.002-05:002009-10-12T22:40:15.879-05:00computer woesI won't be online much for a while until I can get this dang computer to work consistently. So, please, I'm not ignoring you or unappreciative of you all. I just can't get my power jack to work.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8557274.post-76385987141981691062009-10-09T19:43:00.003-05:002009-10-09T22:54:59.081-05:00a bad dayI feel miserable. I have cried from the pain.<br /><br />And now I learn that my niece has overdosed. This has just happened. My heart breaks. I don't know how she is yet.<br /><br />Update: It looks like they got to my niece in time. She has a hospital stay in front of her, and we all have some drama to come, but I am grateful that she is still with us. She is a beautiful, sweet girl. I hope she can learn to be a strong woman.yanubhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16216993058216698199noreply@blogger.com6